Jul 27
Dip in the Scales
Yeah, life's been kinda sucky lately. It's hard to describe, and even harder to rationalize. There've been few enough things to make it sucky, but it just sorta is. Truth is, a number of good things have happened, enough to balance out the negative you'd think, anyways. But whether it just be some unconscious something or another, or just some sort of generic depression, I just feel all out of sorts. Can't write, can't think, can't really even carry on a conversation. I would make a list of a couple things that have been bothering me, then a couple things that should serve to lighten my mood. Hopefully if I list the positive towards the end, that's what I'll leave with.
Negative #1: School Summer Assignments. Yeah, I have a tendency to procrastinate when it comes to books so poorly written they make me want to go hurt someone, so in that aspect I have no one to blame but myself. But still, it whether I decided to put it off or not, it doesn't change the fact that I have to do it, and I still utterly despise the books. The first one's called Sophie's World by Jostein Gaarder. It's supposed to be a schoolkids textbook for western philosophy, cleverly disguised as a novel. In truth, it's little more than an average writer's attempt at a classic, and it fails miserably. The man's brilliant at conveying information, but his storytelling is one of the worst I've ever experienced. And I've experienced some really really lousy RPing.
The second book is the Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver. Quite frankly, I don't care how well this is written, it's 540+ pages of events I have absolutely no interest in at all. Whatever deep, moving messages to be found within can surely be found elsewhere, why am I being made to read this appalling thing?
Negative #2: Driving. I've had my license for a while now, but it's finally coming to the point where I really can't avoid having to actually utilize my ability to drive on my own. Drive period. I'm not bad at it or anything, but I despise doing it, and other drivers quite frankly scare the **** out of me. Call me a wuss, I don't care, it borders irrational phobia.
Negative #3: Friends. It's no secret that I more or less expect ARG to replace me in the Freikorps at some point in the future. Sooner or later, I have no idea, but I expect it, and have expected it since the day I started trying to convince him to join the Comm, and in turn meet Cata. I have no problem with it. If someone can do something better than me and it benefits others, then so be it, let them take the lead, I will help however I can. What I have a problem with is being brushed off. I don't mind being replaced, like a book that's been moved down the shelf to make room for a new favourite, but by no means throw the old book away, it is still good.I'd say that a book has feelings too, but we all know that's not quite true, is it?
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Positive #1: School Starts Soon. That means seeing a number of familiar faces which I haven't seen in a while. It also means lots of laughs are on the way. It's also senior year, which means I need to prepare to go out with a bang. I'm also looking forward to AP Euro class, since I'm hoping it'll help me stay a bit more on par with Cata and his references. Likewise, the Forensic Science class and Chaz's irritatingly accurate deductions.One day Chaz. One day...
Positive #2: Spriting. I picked spriting up again, and found that not only have I not lost what ability I had, but I'm still managing to improve. Or at least I'd like to think so. I'm quite proud of the recreated Renault I made in the FE GBA style, and have placed the still shot in my avatar at the time of posting this. I made it for the purpose of the hack I'm making with a friend (who will be discussed more later), in which he plays a major role in the plot. This in turn came about because I noticed that Renault as a character has one of the most interesting backstories in the series, but is also a very terrible playable unit. Simply put, I believe he deserved better, and so in my hack, h'es going to be the equivalent of Athos in FE7 or Sephiran in FE9&10 (though obviously on the side of good without any doubt). Those of you who have played the games know what I mean.
Positive #3: Friends. They've not been bad to me lately. I've had much more fun chatting with Erica, Paul, Chaz, ARG, Mage, Les, Anne, and others in the past few weeks than I have in a long time. I look forwards to speaking with Erica and Mage more, now that they're back from wherever and so am I. Anne's been a real crutch to lean on lately too. She knows what I mean, and I'll leave it at that. Also, the person I referred to earlier, the friend I'm producing Fire Emblem: Thread of Reality with, has recently been reconciled with. He was the person who hijacked my account a while back. The circumstances behind my forgiving him are far to difficult and many to explain, so I'll just say that Steven is very unique in that he's quite possibly the only person on the planet who could do what he did and I still forgive. All this being said, FE:ToR is back on.
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Meh, I'm done talking about me for now.
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Comment by Anne Brunner, Jul 31 2009, 03:45 PM
HELL YES to the going out with a bang. I plan on doing the same, but probably in a radically different way. Mainly involving pissing off every idiot in the class. I'd rather they hate me than ridicule me.
As for driving... I'm scared s**tless of other drivers. They're so stupid that it should be criminal, yet somehow isn't. Luckily, you have more of a backbone than I do.
At the point that ARG replaces you though, don't you think that will be the day where you have more important things on your mind? As long as they remain your friends, I wouldn't take it to heart so much.
And for the record, all my favorite books stay on the same shelf, even if I have to stuff them in.
Besides, somebody wrote the book, and they had feelings. If their work left an impression on people, I'd say it kind of immortalizes the person. HUG A BOOK TODAY!
... I shut up now. - Add new comment:
3:38 PM Sep 10
